Grandma : Tonight I am Missing You
Here I just stuck on this laptop. I am writing anything on my mind. As you know, tomorrow is Eid–well, Eid Mubarak (again), Grandma.
I don’t wanna ask you like before; how are you today? what were you doing there? Are you feeling cold? Not those questions anymore. I don’t wanna ask you so, not because I don’t care of you anymore. No.. But I am so afraid, damn worry if I got a bad news of you. So, let me think that you are always fine there. It’s enough to me.
Grandma, I think I know something about you there as you came to me las night in my dream. You seemed so sad and worry? What was the problem, Grandma? Why didn’t you say to me? Why so? And even after I asked you, You were fading away like the mist. And you gone. I called you many times, but you’ve gone and didn’t come back to me. You don’t know how did I get confused. You were so confusing!
Grandma, look at me. I am ok here. I’m now in college. Unfortunatelly you didn’t see me on my graduation ceremony. Yeah, I’ve graduated from high school. :’) You’ve told me, you want me to be a clever girl. Graduated soon. Now, I’ve done in high school. Time to fight again in college.
I take journalism as my concentration 🙂 You have to proud of me, Grandma! I will be a journalist soon! Press! Isn’t it cool? yes, it is! Hahaha, yeah, I can see your smile (even it’s not a real sight). I am so glad if you are glad 🙂 I will be like you what ever you feel 🙂 Like you’ve done when you were still here in this world. You got sick after I’ve got well. See, it shows that you love me badly. You will be like me, same to me what ever I am, what ever I feel. :’) And I love you too. It shows in my eyes, there’s you always exist in my eyes.
Grandma, I miss you tonight. I really want to tell everything that I’ve reached. When I was fighting in exams and finally I graduated–even I got 5 in Math 😀 Oh, c’mon… don’t be angry 😀 Hahaha I did my best, na 😀
I think it’s enough to say hello today 🙂 I hope you will be fine always and don’t want to see you in the sadness anymore like in my dream. Seemed I had so many words and topics to share to you, but my tongue is stuck now. I changed to be a hug and missing. Sometimes I can’t hold this longing. I wanna meet you, really. I miss you, but nothing left. The word that I wanna show to is only LOVE. I’ll always love you and miss you so… Take care Grandma…